STAGES OF WORKING FROM HOME
– Yay I get to work from home
– It would be nice to talk to people
– I hope that pigeon sits in the window today
Accidentally made eye contact w/co-worker thru bathroom stall door crack. Didn’t know what to do so I blew him a kiss
interviewer: do you have any experience in a leadership role? me: well, I am the group admin for a WhatsApp group
— beth phoenix (@jaeceratops)
“It’s five o’clock somewhere” I say as I leave work at 9am
The sexiest fantasy in 50 Shades Of Grey is the bit where she gets a job in journalism without having to do years of unpaid work experience.
A secret rendezvous… But it’s me, alone, in the snack closet at work.
— Aimee Helene (@AimeeHelene1)
I did squats today. Mostly because I was hiding from a coworker.
— Gracie Fabulous (@MermaidintheUSA)
Brings donuts to work because if I can’t be skinny neither can you.
I hate my job. The work sucks. The people suck. The pay sucks. *looks up and sees motivational poster on wall* Well this changes everything
— Bucky Isotope (@BuckyIsotope)
Applications be like “Why should I hire you?” 😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐😐 Me: because your hiring
— ⏬SONO⏬ (@sonofzuez)
I told all my colleagues at work that I have a twin so that when I see them in public I don’t have to talk to them.
— Sweet Slips (@Ndeshi_M)
Starting a blog that’s just reviews of the food I steal out of the fridge at work.
— Underchilde (@Underchilde)
You ever look at one of your coworkers who’s stressing out and think “You really give a fuck about this job,huh? Wow.”
— Larry Beyince (@DragonflyJonez)
The problem with teaching a man to fish is that eventually somebody will microwave that fish in the work break room.
— mark (@TheCatWhisprer)
Adorable idea. Colleagues have been writing names on their food in the office fridge. I am currently eating a yoghurt called Debbie
— Mrs Joshua Homme (@FussySaffa)
Office fun: replace your coworker’s mouse with a larger mouse so he thinks his hands are shrinking then call him “baby hands” until he quits
— viney (@vineyille)
[waiting for elevator] Coworker: Hey, how’s it go- Me: I’ll take the stairs.
— moody monday (@mdob11)
[At supermarket] “Excuse me do you work here?” WHAT? ME? Work HERE? Hell no. I went to college. I don’t have a job
— Ristolable (@Ristolable)
Please ignore this tweet, I’m pretending to be adding a coworker’s phone number.
— Miss Malbec (@MissMalbec)