The Top 30 Excuses To Get Out Of Work

 The Best Excuses to Get Out of Work Anything

This list is from and I’ll admit I’ve never heard #16, 18, 21, 22 or #27, and very glad I never had anyone use #19.    And aren’t #7 and #12 the same thing?  In fact #1 is pretty much the same as well.

I have had some great “sick calls” over the years though.  In particular:

—Employee calls in sick but he’s an avid skier and I can literally hear the snow in the background.

–Employee calls out sick for his day shift, but then shows up at our company Christmas Party that night and is suddenly fine!

–New employee (teenager) calls out every Saturday for 5 weeks straight.  Call his house to see how he’s doing and his mom answers and says “Oh, he’s out surfing today.”  When I explain to her that her son is probably going to be fired for poor attendance, she says “Well, he probably deserves it.”

and my all-time favorite:

–Employee calls out sick, then towards the end of the day calls and says “I feel really bad, because I wasn’t really sick and went to the beach.  I’m sorry I lied to you and just had to tell you the truth.”   I’m thinking “Wow, he found his conscience.”  Next day he shows up to work with a BAD sunburn!  He knew he’d be busted so decided to minimize the damage by apologizing before he came in.  Great stuff.

The Best Excuses to Get Out of Work

  1. Food Poisoning

  2. You Have the Flu

  3. Your Kid is Sick

  4. Doctor’s Appointment

  5. Car Trouble

  6. Tragedy in the Family

  7. Have the Runs

  8. You Have a Migraine

  9. Someone Is in the Hospital

  10. You Have a Cold (Cough, Cough)

  11. You Had An Allergic Reaction to Something

  12. Relative’s Funeral

  13. You Got in a Car Accident

  14. Your Flight Back Into Town Got Cancelled

  15. You Are Snowed In

  16. You Have Bad Cramps

  17. You Have to Meet With Your Kid’s Teacher

  18. I’m Dead

  19. You Honestly Tell Your Boss Why You Can’t/Don’t Want to Come In

  20. You Need a Mental Health Day

  21. Your Apartment Caught On Fire

  22. I Pooed in My Pants On the Way to Work

  23. You Need a “Personal” Day

  24. A Friend’s Wedding

  25. Root Canal

  26. Won the Lottery

  27. You Are Depressed

  28. You Are Getting Your Wisdom Teeth Removed